Day One

Well...I rate it a 3.

I am getting close to a breakthrough. I am cutting back on the cigarettes after getting enough money for a last pack or two. Tomorrow I must call Ontario Works. Here, in London. We'll see what happens. If I go away or have to rearrange it for Toronto, I will cross that bridge when I come to it. If I have to look for anything, with a job pending in Toronto, so be it.

Okay. So...It's late. I don't want to completely shun my family either and we always eat late. That leads to a walk for me. I read 25 pages of Five People You Meet in Heaven by Mitch Albom. Sharpa recommends Tuesdays with Morie and I've read One More Day. Apparently Tuesdays is downstairs. Great books all of them. Good lessons and a very readable writing style.

I didn't get much physical exercise today. Tomorrow I will post what would be my ideal day. Things will shift for sure, especially when I start the new job. I anticipate very long days. Can't wait!!!

I am upbeat overall. I've smoked less today and almost quit. It's hard to get started. Excuses, Excuses. Time to read Easy Way again. I'm also just starting to read The Power of Now again. All these books tie in together quite nicely. Now it's putting it all into practice. Even Beck's Starlight book talks about being true to your destiny, finding happiness within, being in the Now, seeing trials as tests to strengthen you, the voice of fear/EGO and being. Carr's approach is to create a demon that is the nicotine addiction and to just pat it on the head, which is Beck's approach to dealing with one's fears. Sharma talks about recognizing your problems first in order to solve them and controlling your 'Monkey Mind' which is akin to Tolle's discussions about stepping back to recognize when thought is driven by the EGO.

So, I feel that as I get closer to Tolle's definition of enlightenment, to be awake and conscious and use one's mind as a tool rather than being a tool of one's mind, I will get closer to quitting smoking and leading a better life, fitter and more active with more energy and eating a healthy diet. Once I can do that I will also recognize, I believe my true calling in life. See, writing really does help me figure this stuff out.

I also took a nap today. That's after sleeping from about 6:00 am to 11:00 am. Dreadful, even if I'm not working right now. With that, I sign off from Day 1! More in the morning.